Profound Encounter

It was a pleasure and an honor to meet you today! Is all that came to mind out the end of this profound encounter? In one day I met a man, grew to love him, his family and his closest friends, and have decided to dedicate my life in light of what I learned about him in just one day. It was a quite introduction for he was a man of very little words, which was okay with me because for the most part words get in the way. As I sat down in his presence he began to tell the tales of his life and the truth was unfolding before my eyes. First, he shared pictures of his fondest memories with me. Then, one by one I heard the stories of his generosity and love. As I witnessed the unfolding of the stories a bubbling desire within my own soul was beginning to surface. I thought to myself “I wish I was like him” “I wish I had these stories.”
One by one family and friends rose to be heard. One by one they told stories of his kindness, love, and generosity. Some stories were about his giving heart and some were about his integrity and about how he went above and beyond to lend a helping hand. He gave without expectations and without others knowing what he was doing. He found pure joy in his own giving. Some stories of his giving heart were just being heard for the first time by many. My favorite stories were the ones about his tough love and the imprint he left on the lives of his loved ones. He was referred to as a helper, a healer, a “God like Spirit.” He helped others get an education, get off drugs, become successful, and most importantly he inspirited them to a better quality of life.
I met a man who was not famous or rich beyond reach, he was not educated with a PHD, he was not a scholar of any kind. But make no mistake he was no ordinary man. He was a father, a husband, an entrepreneur, a grandfather, a friend, a boss, a giver, and an inspiration to everyone that came within his reach.
I’ve never seen so many stand up in honor of their loved one before. He touched and inspirited more people than he’ll ever know. He even uplifted and inspired me, without even knowing my name, for the day I met this man was the day of his funeral. I never encounter the physicality of him before, however I met an extraordinary spirit. One I’ll never forget. This was the first person I ever met in spirit first and desire with all my heart to be as much as an up-lifter as he was. I just want to say it was a pleasure and an honor to meet you today!

Embrace

Abundant Space

The white cap waves curl under the current of
the ever moving Atlantic. The waves crashing
against the rocks, my gaze falls upon the
horizon as I sit birched upon the remains of an
abused surface of smoothed rocks. As my gaze
fixes on the horizon I’m reminded ever so softly
of the abundance of space.
Anyone who has fixed their own gaze upon the
horizon as I have surely can relate to this
abundant feeling. Where the water meets the
sky you can see no beginning or no ending, its
breath taking to say the least. It doesn’t matter
where you stand; on a boat afloat in the water,
on the beaches along the coast, or birched on
the rocks as I was, the view is the same;
everlasting.
It meant more to me on this particular day
because I was pondering what space meant to
me and I asked the heavens about space in my
prayers. I was wondering about how to create
more space in my being, my present, and my
heart. I was wondrously led to this place of
peace and abundance to be shown that space is
not something you seek; it’s already present in
an abundant amount!
We spend so much of our physical lives
squeezing each other out of space; we horde it,
protect it, fight over it, we even die for it and
very few of us ever realize that there is no need
for any feeling of “lack of space” , not even in
our hearts. We have as much space in us as we
do on out of us. It’s all abundant.
We came in this physical experience with all the
space we need. We have space for love, peace,
family, nature, and the list goes on and on. We
don’t need to seek space in our lives we just
have to become aware of its existence.
It’s not the seeking we need to practice it’s the
knowing. Because with the knowing brings
clarity and with clarity brings speed and
abundance of all things.
This day by the ocean has changed me
significantly. I’m not longer wondering how to
create space in my being. Instead I’m practices
being still and quiet so I can feel this abundant
space all around me.
When you quiet your mind and sit with the
stillness of your being we can create the same
feeling of no beginning and no ending within
yourself and you begin to realize that most of
things we’re fighting for don’t really mean
anything in the big scheme of things

The Power of Forgiveness - It's an inside Job

True forgiveness is not about bells and whistles and happy endings. It’s not about demanding another to forgive you or for them to ask for your forgiveness. True forgiveness is something words can only begin to descript.

When the power of forgiveness enters your soul there is no need to do, think, or say anything. When true forgiveness consumes your heart and soul words of the ego are no longer necessary. It’s a beautiful thing.

If you’re asking for forgiveness then you haven’t forgiveness yourself, if you demanding forgiveness from another that you still haven’t forgiven yourself. To me, forgiveness not something to be had, you become healed when you let go of what ills you on the subject. It’s like one day your carry a bag of rocks and your arms start to hurt so you drop the bag of rocks to free your arms. But you walk around complaining about the hurt the bag of rocks caused your arms. Did you really drop the bag of rocks? No. When you drop the bag of rocks lift your arms up in the air and proclaim Alleluia, step over the rocks, and tell no one. Now you truly dropped the bag of rocks. Forgiveness is the same thing.

Since, no one in the universe is responsible for your feelings; but you. How can you forgive another for the feelings you created yourself on the subject? You can’t. You can only forgive yourself. Once you forgive yourself and your self inflicted punishment is dropped like the bag of rocks and you go back to believing your deserving and worthy of love and joy has forgiveness truly happened for you.

The power comes from within. No one ever really needs to forgive another or be forgiven by another; it’s an inside job. If you stay true to whom you are and always speak your truth then forgiveness will never be necessary, because you won’t allow someone else to control your feelings.

Recently, I experienced a perfect example of this truth. I felt that a good friend of my hurt my feelings and instead of confronting her about it or speaking my truth at the time, by saying “hey that just hurt.” I stuffed the feelings down inside my ego, mind, and physical bodies so I could replay the events later really become more and more and more hurt by them. Within days I was no longer talking to her it hurt so much and before I knew it weeks had gone by with me ignoring her all the while replay these events at least once a day. Finally, she confronted me and asked if everything was all right or was I upset about something. At that moment the pain had grown so much I couldn’t control myself and I let it all out in a very hurtful manner. She was stocked. She had no idea those comments she made that day effected me the way they did. How could she I didn’t tell her and she’s not a mind reader. To her she was only kidding around and didn’t mean anything by them and thought I was laughing with her. She now was crying and upset because I made her believe she had hurt me, when in truth I hurt myself. I took these little comments and replayed them in my mind until I created such a large painful movie of events in my mind that the victim (me) was so pained she couldn’t go on. I let this event control my thoughts and feelings for weeks before I lashed out at her in pain. had I just been true to myself at the time and said to her; that hurt. None of this mess would have happened. What a waste of energy. She did apologize to me, but later I prayed on this apology and was thinking to myself “why did she apologize for something she truly didn’t do?

It doesn’t make sense anymore. We walk around demanding forgiveness from others for feelings we created in our own selves. When one asks for forgiveness what does it really mean? And when one forgives what does that mean?Forgiveness to me is an omission of guilt. Guilt is from the feeling of hurting someone else feelings, right or doing something "wrong" in the eyes of another? Well, I had an awakening in consciousness from this event with my friend. Someone else is not responsible for how you feel, so if someone hurts your feelings whose fault is it, really? I'm beginning to believe it's yours or mine in this example.If we fall victim to someone or feel someone has "wronged" us in some way, than it's us feeling bad and feeling lower levels of energy. If we feel "wronged" than it's because we didn't speak OUR TRUTH! not that they hurt us. When you speak your truth there is no such thing as a victim. It wouldn't be allowed. If you allow it, then it's you who should be forgiving yourself.The true power of forgiveness is becoming conscious to this truth. The truth that only the oneself can truly be forgiven and nothing on the outside makes any difference at all.

If I only have today

If I only have Today

If I only have today
Let your love shine in all things
If I only have today,
Let me witness smiles on all faces
If I only have today,
Let love be my theme
If I only have today,
Let me be giving
For if tomorrow never comes,
I’ll be honored to say I experienced it all today.

If I only have today
Let grace lead me
If I only have today,
Let me help the needy
If I only have today,
Let me hear the birds singing
If I only have today,
Let me speak my truth
For if tomorrow never comes,
It’s okay, because I experienced it all today.

If I only have today
Let my heart be open
If I only have today,
Let me heal & be healing
If I only have today,
Let my love leave a mark
If I only have today,
Let me be remembered for a giving heart
For if tomorrow never comes,
I’ll be forever grateful, that you allowed me to experience it all today.

Embrace

The Unfolding of "I am" in me

as published in aspire magazine June 08

I sit amongst this unfolding experience I ponder the “I am” in me. I used to think I was all the things I liked and I wasn’t all the things I didn’t like. But as I begin to become continuous of the stillness within me a huge transformation is taking place. I’m finding many times throughout my days that the voice in my head is silent, which is a blessing in and of itself and I’m experiencing stillness in the middle of noise. Collogues and family have inquired if something is wrong with me during these experiences because I’m not reacting to the situations that we were in. When asked, I was shocked because during those moments of stillness I was just being in the moment and didn’t have any thought at all or any opinion about the topic of discussion, which was why they posed the question, but nothing is wrong on the contrary everything is right! The stillness and peace that I’m feeling is so cool and at the same time a little confusing. I’m used to my old story of a fighter, standing up for what I think is right, and making sure everyone knew where I stood on subjects, but now as I embark of this wonderful world of letting go and just being okay with the moments as they present themselves so many insightful things are unfolding. I’m just in awe.
Some insights of who I really am are starting to come forward. I’m beginning to feel the energy in my body. I’m beginning to feel closer to others. Just the other day I was in the store and my goal was to just “be” in the store and to project energy and love as I walked around. I was amazed to see how many people said hello to me and turned to smile at me and at the register the bagger told the cashier not to forget to run the store coupon through for the soup discount for the soup I was buying. All I did was smile at her. I won a free message today too, from a wellness event I attended. It’s all little things but to me they’re big, because of how I feel about them. I feel lighter and freer.
As a part of this transformation and unfolding within me I’ve decided to no longer tell my story of who I am from past experiences. Because I’ve realized that even though those past experiences have brought me to where I am, they are not the “I am” in me. They are not my being and their not important enough at least to the degree that I need to label me as part of them.
Also, I’ve stopped blaming, complaining, and justify situations I’ve created that I’m not pleased with. I’m just going to be in the moment knowing that I created this moment through my own thoughts and if I don’t like the moment than I will change the next moment to be something pleasing, but I’m not going to blame, justify or complain about the moment or every moment there after will be more of the same.
The unfolding that I’m experiencing requires continuous consciousness or awareness about what I’m thinking, feeling, and doing. But like anything the more I do it the easier it becoming.
The glimpses I’ve had of the “I am” in me and power, joy, and love that this “knowing” brings to me makes me so happy to be sharing this moment.
And the biggest blessing that has come forth is my passion for writing and sharing. I love how I feel when I can reduce resistance in others as well as myself. I’m so joyous and I hope this finds you in the same state of being.
Blessings.

Forgiveness? What does it really mean?

When one asks for forgiveness what does it really mean? And when one forgives what does that mean?

Forgiveness to me is an omission of guilt. Guilt is from the feeling of hurting someone else feelings, right? OR.....doing something "wrong" in the eyes of another.

Well now that I'm on this new road of self discovery, I realize that someone else is not responsible for how I feel anyway, so if someone hurts my feelings, who's fault is it, really? I'm beginning to believe it's mine.

If I fall victim to someone or feel someone has "wronged" me in someway, than it's me feeling bad and feeling lower levels of energy. If I feel "wronged" than it's because I didn't speak MY TRUTH! not that they hurt me.

when you speak your truth there is no such thing as a victim. It wouldn't be allowed. If I allow it, than it's I that should be forgiving myself.

Seeking

I was listening to Zen yesterday morning and I realized how much of my life I'm seeking things. The message I'm receiving is:

Seeking is the damag'er of your physical experience. The process of seeking means your feeling something missing. When you feel the missing of something you're focused on the "not having" so you begin to seek. This process is damaging to your being or essence because, how can you seek what you already have?

You're not lost my child. You are the essence of what you're seeking. Rather than focus on the seeking of what you feel is missing, focus on the feeling of having this missing thing and you'll have it. You see because it's only your perception or awareness of them that brings them into the light for you. they already exist in the here and now.

When you change focus you can see more clearly the truth that you seek.

Thank you!
I feel so blessed to receive messages of love. They are so powerful & I do seek what I feel is missing. I will begin to work on that.

So while practicing this message yesterday afternoon I decided to attempt to "feel" a result of a business transaction that was bothering me and I was again feeling like it wasn't happening. But instead of just thinking about the result I wanted, I "felt" it with my core for about 5Min's. Then I was interrupted by my next appointment...well my phone rang during this appointment but I didn't answer, so as to not be rude.
Upon leaving my appointment I checked my messages and don't-you-know it was the beginning of the result I was looking for. It's amazing how fast that happened. I was smiling from ear to ear with excitement "I did it!!!"

You have to practice this, it's fun. but you can't just "think it" you have to "think and feel it from the core of your being"

Embrace